AM I A HALLOWEENIE

 

Am I becoming a Halloweenie?

Over the past few years my thoughts on Halloween have been changing some.   When I was a kid I was a fan of the Halloween candy but somewhere along the line I just didn’t enjoy Halloween.   I was a Halloween Scrooge   BOO HUMBUG !

But now I kind of enjoy Halloween time.  Why?  Ghoul 103.9   Several years ago we at KOOL thought it would be fun to supply the soundtrack for Halloween.   At 3 pm the transformation begins and KOOL becomes Ghoul with 6  hours of music, comedy and sounds about Halloween  .  As I started to put the show together I started to see the fun side of Halloween.   The costumes are amazing especially the kids when they come by trick or treating.

Here is a list of Halloween movies you might consider.  1st Scary movies.   I am not a fan of slasher movies and scary movies so I think I have only seen one on this list from Society19.com

Movies they recommend.  A quite place… Truth or dare…  Before I wake…. The 1st purge …Predator.

Now I have seen the original Predator with Arnold and Jesse the Body Ventura. I really liked it.  (I ain’t got time to bleed)

But there are also a lot of movies that are fun and scary , I call them Halloween lite.  Some movies you might consider.   Fright night…. The Adams family… The monster squad… Shaun of the dead… this movie has a cult following and I tried to watch it, notice the word tried…. Ghostbusters…. Abbot and Costello meet Frankenstein and the one I have to watch every year is Young Frankenstein.   I LOVE THIS MOVIE!

One other movie that you might consider is not really a scary or a funny Halloween movie but it is a Bio movie called ED WOOD.   Johnny Deep as a real life movie writer and director who was more than a little out there.  He was the king of the old B movies and directed what a lot of movie critics say is the ‘Worst movie ever made” Plan 9 from outer space.   As bad as Plan 9 was Ed Wood was the opposite.   This is one quirky movie that to me is a must see.   I would probably put it on a personal Top 10 list.

So as we get closer and closer to Halloween maybe I will try a few scary movies… Nah, but I will watch the fun ones.   Maybe I will become more of a Halloweenie

STUPID NEWS

 

LAFF LINES

 

TIME TO FREAK OUT

PHOBIA’S

I think we all have them, things that just freak us out. Phobias.

I am slightly claustaphobic, so imagine my joy when I was told twice in a 9 month span that I needed a M.R.I.   The test where they put you on a table the width of a traffic stripe on the highway then slide you in to a tube! 

I must have looked like a tube of toothpaste! 

Then if you are a big guy you …. Well let’s just say

I FELT LIKE FREAKING OUT!

Somehow through sheer will power, determination and a super-human effort and a **** of a lot of screaming in my head I made it through!  After both test my wife rewarded me by taking me to a restaurant for some celebratory BACON!

Phobia’s are real and some are so bad person’s lifestyle is altered.

 “Ultimate Classic Rock” put together a list of PHOBIAS that various rock stars have been known to have . . .

Here they are, starting with the more common fears:

  1. David Bowie, Gene Simmons, David Lee Roth, Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys, Christine McVie of Fleetwood Mac, and Chris Cornell . . . all have a fear of FLYING

Sheryl Crow . . . fear of HEIGHTS ,     Ozzy Osbourne . . . afraid of RATS    Freddie Mercury . . . afraid of SPIDERS    Nikki Sixx and Johnny Cash . . . afraid of SNAKES.    Alice Cooper and Joe Perry of Aerosmith . . . afraid of NEEDLES.    Dave Davies of The Kinks and Johnny Depp . . . fear of CLOWNS.   Ringo Starr . . . fear of GERMS.

So you aren’t alone with your phobia.  Just ask Dr. Lucy Van Pelt.

On the morning show I got humbled!

Stupid news

 

I AM A BATMAN MAN

The greatest super hero of all time in my opinion and since this is my blog it is the opinion that counts is

BATMAN!

Today in 1915 Bob Kane was born.  His mind gave us THE BATMAN!

From his debut in Detective comics #27 until today Bat fans have followed the crime fighting efforts of The Caped Crusader in books ,TV shows , movie shorts and feature link films both live action and animated.  (I recommend the animated films).

Like many in my generation I became a Batman man with a POW- ZAPP- KABOOM of the old Batman TV classic.  I love them all.

I guess the morality play of The Batman has been the magnet for me.  Knowing here was a man who lost his parents who wanted to do the right thing was in part my story.  I lost my Dad when I was four and despite some missteps along the way I wanted to be like Batman.  And if I got to knock out a couple bullies along the — even better.

Yes, I was bullied a lot as a kid and only wanted to fight as a last resort.  I had a lot of last resorts until puberty set in and my bullies didn’t grow as much as I did.   I PUT BATMAN WHOOPING ON THEM!

Now as an older man I still am a Batman Man, reading comics and colleting Comic books I look forward to the time I retire sit in my recliner with a Batman comic and fall asleep so I can dream of fighting The Joker, The Riddle and other villains.  But really look forward to dreams about THE CATWOMAN

 

Today on the morning show

Stupid news

Laff lines

 

HAUNTED HOUSE MEMORIES

Some people enjoy getting scared!   NOT ME … I LIKE HAVING CONTROL OF MY BODILY FUNCTIONS.

So I don’t do horror movies, haunted houses or corn mazes.  It has only been the past few years that have started enjoying Halloween.  That has happened with producing our GHOUL 1039 show.

THIS HALLOWEEN 3PM UNTIL 9PM

That doesn’t mean I haven’t had hunted house experience.  As a teenager a family friend needed help at a haunted house and asked me to help.  I get to the event and was told my help would be lying in a real coffin with a stake through my heart for 5 hours.  WITHOUT A BATROOM BREAK!  Now that is scary!

Make up was applied a fake wooden stake place on my chest and ketchup applied (this in the days before Mayo Chup).   I was placed in the coffin and waited for people to stare at me as I watched them through squinted eyes.  I must admit to sitting up and scaring a few.

But the best game when two teenage girls peered into the coffin wondering if this was who they thought it was.  They tried everything they could to make me break but I held on. (After a few hours without a bathroom break I knew all about holding on!)

As the girls walked away I sprung up out of my coffin trying to get to them.  The whole place erupted in laughter as these two girls started screaming and running away.  Let’s just say I got a good scolding at school the next day.

A few years ago I was with two girls at Lake O the Ozarks in MO.  When the younger talked her cousin and I to go to a haunted house.  OK, yes I had to pay for it too. As the scare fest began the 2 girls said “Dave, you big strong handsome man led the way!” (I added the handsome part because this is my story)  We made our way through being screamed, jumped and visually assaulted I had to stop in my tracks, why I felt spider webs!  I told my friends to be prepared but it didn’t help.   I had 2 girls jumping on me a digging there finger nails into my shoulders and arms.  Yes marks were made which took days to heal.  As we exited I could hear one of the girls say.  Why did he take us in that place?

Still makeS me laugh

Here is a story I found about a really scary haunted house

There’s a haunted house in Summertown, Tennessee called McKamy Manor.  And it may be the world’s SCARIEST haunted house.

 If you make it through, you get a $20,000 prize.  But . . . NO ONE’S ever made it through.

 Why is it so scary?  It uses hypnotism to play MIND GAMES with people.  Or, more accurately, to psychologically TORTURE them.  And it messes with them so much that they ALL wind up saying the phrase to get out:  “You really don’t want to do this.” 

If you’re interested in trying, you need to sign a 40-page waiver, complete a physical, pass a drug test, prove you have medical insurance, and pass a background check.  You also have to watch a two-hour video montage of people quitting.

 

Today on the morning show

Stupid news

Laff lines

TODAY I AM A KNUCKLEHEAD!

Today I say we all embrace our knuckle heads!  Why?

It’s Curly Howards Birthday.

Curly is a comic legend as are all of the stooges.  But in my opinion Curly took slap stick comedy to another level.

Every year on this date October 22 we should pause for a few laughs call each other Knuckleheads and do the curly shuffle

Today on the morning show: what to do with the leaves

Stupid news is from Salt Lake City and Senator Mitt or is it Pierre

SOMETIME I MAKE MISTAKES BUT LIFE HAPPENS

Whenever you are “Live on the air” things happen.

When the earthquake hit Nevada a few years ago we felt it here in Logan!  I was on the air about 7:15 am when the microphone stated moving and hit me in the nose!  Well to be honest it was more of a small bop on the nose.

I was on the air in Montgomery city MO. when lighting hit our radio tower and came traveled into the studio and gave me a shock. (Once again not bad)

I have had coworkers MOON me, throw things at me. Sneak up on me to scare me all on the air. Doing a sports broadcast a parent of one of the players was upset at a Ref, he turned around got about 2 inches from my face to express his displeasure.  Face it the man was more than displeased and loudly expressed it with a string of profanities that would make a sailor blush.  I think the entire seventh fleet proud!

Then you have the times when your body takes over sneezing burping and other loud explosive body functions happen.  But this morning was a first listen to this

Well at least it was better than some explosive body sounds….

Stupid news

Laff Lines

WHAT SONG IS YOU WANT TO HEAR

I can remember the 1st time I ever heard the song “Free Bird” by Lynyrd Skyrynd… I was in the 11th grade ate beginning of a school day in “homeroom” It was in the schools band room and the teacher would let one person to bring in an album for us to listen too as we prepared for the rest of the day.

This particular day my friend Kendrick brought in the Album “Pounced” and my musical life changed forever.  What can you say about “”FREEBIRD” except it touched me in such a way that I have requested the song to be played at my funeral.

The anniversary of the plane crash in Mississippi in 1977 is this Sunday October 20th.  It was a Thursday and I was working the night shift at a radio station in Rexburg when the news broke of the crash that took the lives of lead singer Ronnie Van Zant; guitarist Steve Gaines and his sister, backup singer Cassie Gaines; Skyrynd manager Dean Kilpatrick, as well as the plane’s two pilots Walter McCreary and William Gray. All the other members of the band suffered horrific injuries, from which they eventually recovered.

The band eventually reformed with Johnny Van Zant on lead vocals.

For several years the band would only do an instrumental version of the song.  This is from The Volunteer Jam with Charlie Daniels joining the band.

In 1991 I finally got to see the band in concert and that tour was the first that Jonny Van Zant would sing the vocals.

Over the years the band has seen band members die away and in 2019 Lynyrd Skyrynd calling it quits.

I will always be part of the SKynyrd  nation

Today on the morning show: The Friendship zone:

Stupid news:  three stories about Sponge Bob Square Pants

Laff Lines;

FEELING OLD

YOU ARE ONLY AS OLD AS YOU FEEL AND I FEEL OLD!

At one time of my life I was a thin good looking young man with a full head of hair.   OK, I was never thin.  But I was thinner, somewhat.  My hair has become gray and I am still good looking.  Hahahahahahahahhahahahahahah

As much as we try you can’t stop getting older.  That is what we do.  All the creams, lotions, pills, dyes, and plastic surgery doesn’t keep Father Time from taking its toll.

You might remember  a stupid news story  we had a story of a man in the Netherlands who is 69 years old and he is going to court.  TO CHANGE HIS AGE!  He says that he identifies with being 49 years old.   Another reason he wants to legally change his age is so he can meet more women through social media.

Hey Bubba no matter what you do your body is still 69 and you are becoming a vain old coot.  Is that too harsh. Ok you are becoming a vain old idiot.  Ahh I feel better now.

Age didn’t creep up on me, Age came up to me face to face and laughed in my face.

Two things happened to me that made me age quickly.

In the year 2000 I had dark hair and beard but I became very ill.  I spent so much time at the Dr’s office and in and out of the hospital and the stress of that illness turned my hair grey very quickly.

Just a few years ago another thing happened to age me quickly.  I broke my foot.  That doesn’t sound so bad now does it?  But that broken foot led to other things.  I had a screw put into my foot and when I finally got out of the walking boot the extra stress on my opposite knee had caused enough damage that I needed a knee replacement.  A 3 day hospital stay became 2 and a half weeks.  Today I can walk, but I am not what I used to be.   But then again who is!

Here are the top ten simple tasks that get a lot harder as you age . . .

  1. Picking things up off the floor. (The floor needs to be a lot closer)
  2. Opening jars or packaging. (Not a problem …….YET)
  3. Getting up and down the stairs. (I hate stairs, but I always have.  In college I once fell down the same flight of stairs 3 times in a 24 hour period)
  4. Household chores. (What, I have chores)
  5. Getting in and out of the bathtub. (Shower time)
  6. Standing up out of a chair. (Major for me, I need most chairs to be just a little higher)
  7. Walking long distances.  (Bad feet, bad knee’s)
  8. Using modern technology. (Dag gum fancy computers anyway)
  9. Putting your shoes on, and taking them off.
  10. Driving. (Not a problem….. yet.  I am a great driver…..  At least I am a good driver… well above average. Only one ticket in my life!

So as you can see we get older some age gracefully, some …..  Not so much.

Just remember this “AGE IS ONLY REALATIVE. I AM JUST GLAD I HAVE REALATIVES OLDER THAN ME”

Today on the morning show Sandwiches

 

 

Stupid news:  I fought the law and Rats

Laff Lines:

 

THE BOSS IS NOT ALWAYS BRUCE

Image result for the boss

  

Today is National Boss’s Day.  I have been on both sides of the desk and I hope that the times I have worn that bosses hat that I was a good one.

I know that we have all had THE BAD BOSS.   I have had two of those in my life and it is not easy to work for someone you don’t respect.  I am a lucky man today because I can say I have great respect for my Boss and supervisors.

NOW I CAN GO WASH MY BROWN NOSE!

No really I do have respect for my boss and supervisor.

When I have been the boss I found myself trying to juggle being fair not only to my employer but to those I was supervising who were my friends.  I found myself struggling with that.  I came up with a solution that worked for me if I ever had to do the boss thing.  I drew a line in the sand.  I was their friend but I had a job to do, so I would tell them this is Dave the boss.  It worked well….most of the time.

Early in my career I was at a Friday night station party and knew my co-worker had to be at the station at 6am.                                                                                 Let’s just say she was having a good time and maybe too much of a good time.

It was 5:15 when I was snoozing away when the phone rang.  “Dave I am so sick, can you go in and work for me?”

Dave the boss had to step up.  “There is difference between being hungover and sick and you are hung over, so I suggest you go to work and be hungover while doing it”   The conversation got a little heated until I reminded her that she knew she had to work and made the decision to get drunk anyway, so she either worked or might lose her job.

Harsh?  I don’t think so but I did consider this woman one of my good friends so it was hard to do. When I replaced her at noon I knew she was more than upset and she didn’t speak to me for 2 weeks.  But our friendship survived and we are still in touch via Facebook.

That experience showed me how hard it can be to be The Boss.

Rock and roll hall of fame nominees are out.

Stupid news

ROLLIN WITH THE FLOW

Rollin with the flow that is kind of the way I approach life.

But life seems to be flowing at a pace where I want to scream

SLOW DOWN

I have been  dealing with a few health issues for the past few months.

I recently had surgery on my left elbow for a nerve issue.  At the same time I had surgery on my left wrist to repair a torn tendon.  That included screws and pins.  The pain from that surgery is still there and causes more pain than I thought it would.

The flow continues to increase with two Dr visits on October 29th.  One to examine the wrist and put on a new cast.  Second Dr is to discuss a possible neck surgery for this fall.

But as the song say’s “IT JUST KEEPS ROLLING ALONG”.

Today I get to go to the dentist and have a wisdom tooth removed!

So can there be any more flow?

It is cold and flu season…. You never know with the FLOW..

 

Stupid news: Linus and dog pooh

Laff lines: