RESPECT FOR THOSE WHO GAVE ALL

 

I have always had respect for the Military who have served this country.   As teenager I was seriously considering a military. Now on this Memorial Day weekend I want to say THANK YOU to all who served, especially to those who gave all.

My family was affected by this tragedy during WWII, My Uncle Edward was killed in France about the time of the liberation of Paris. I never got to meet him nor did I learn much about him but one day having a talk with my Mother she talked a little about his death and how it affected my Father.  Mom said that my dad had a difficult time dealing with his brother’s death because they never found the body.  I know it had to be extra difficult for the entire family, I can’t even imagine the pain, the loss.  As I sit here now it brings a tear to my eye knowing this.

Memorial Day has also become a day for us to remember family and friends who have passes away from us.

And now Memorial Day also means, road trips, family reunions, camping, boating BBQ and retail sales.   Nothing wrong with that but please take few minutes to remember why Memorial Day began.

As a youth I had another reason to celebrate Memorial Day.  It was celebrated on May 30th and that is my Birthday.  I used to joke that the weekend was to celebrate my birth.

On the morning show: The Boss goes down

       

Stupid news: Alexa is listening, and finding the right parking space.

Laff lines: The Duck pond

 

 

ME AND OL ROO!

I was born at a time when Black and White TV was a thing and you had to have a good set of “Rabbit Ears” so you could watch your favorite show.   Of course you had to make that antenna better by applying aluminum foil on the Rabbit Ears too.

I know younger readers will be saying SAY WHHHAAAAT!  How old is this dude?  Let’s just say that I celebrate another in a long line of birthdays next week.

On the Ellen DeGeneres show yesterday Mark Walhberg announce he was going to bring back to TV one of my childhood hero’s CAPTIAN KANAGOO!

Oh boy oh boy oh boy, did I watch the old Capitan back when I was a kid.  Somewhere in the Denton archives there is a picture (black and white) of me sitting on the floor watching OL ROO.

My mother told me that I would sit still every day for Captain Kangaroo.  It was a sweet innocent show that would teach you values without being overhanded doing so.   The Magic Drawing board, Mr. Green Jeans, Bunny Rabbit and Mr. Moose are some of my earliest memories.  Today I can still picture the site of Mr. Moose with Ping Pong balls being dropped all over him.

         

Here is a trivia fact that you might not know Bob Keeshan who was the Captain was also featured in an earlier kids show.  Bob was the original Clara Bell the Clown on the Howdy Doodie show.

Thanks Mark for bring back a great child hood memory.  I hope it is a success.  But can a sweet low key show for kids make it today.  If they struggle with ratings just drop some ping pong balls on a moose!  Makes me laugh every time!

Today on the morning show the Sherriff in Nye County NV forgot something very important.   Plus. What brings us JOY?

Stupid news:  An update on moving out and THE POOP TRAIN

LAFF LINES: The old days

One more thing- when I was a teenager I was talked into being in a play about Nursery Rhymes,  I was the Ginger bread man but the I looked more like Dancing Bear

HOW NOT TO START THE DAY

 

How did you start your day today?  Did you sleep until the alarm clock goes off?   Did you complete the three S’ss. …..

SHOWER—SHAVE ——–SHAMPOO?   (Do you have a dirty mind?)

Well today was kind of a strange start of the day for me.   I woke up at 3:15 am with a cough, as soon at that coughing attack subsided natured called and I don’t have call waiting.  By the time that is over it is 3:40am.  NOW I HAVE A DILEMMA ON MY HANDS!  What to do what to do?  My alarm goes off at 4:15am so do I.

  1. Go back to bed for 35 minutes and wake up at 4:15am to the annoying sound of the alarm.
  2. Read a book ( Comic Variety of course)
  3. Watch TV for a few minutes OR
  4. Get an early breakfast then take care of the three S’ss and go to work.

I opted for D.  Went to the bedroom turned off the alarm and got the early start to my day, feeling great about my choice.

As they say on those TV commercial   WAIT THERE’S MORE

I stop to get a fountain drink at a nearby store and didn’t realize that the fountain was almost out of syrup so my drink was mostly carbonated water.  BUT WAIT THER’S MORE!   I spilled some of my drink on my shirt and it was cold soda. BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE.   I get into the studios and our computer system had failed and we were off the air.  If you heard a scream about 5:15 am it was Me!

So with all this going on you can imagine how panicked I was when I realize it was almost 6am and I was not prepared to be on the air!

What could I do?   What did I do?  NOT A DANG THING!

Actually I just started to try to catch up and slowly I did.   It was a fun way to start the day.
So on Thursday I hope to start my day with the three S’ss

On the morning show:  Cutting the cheese out of my Cheeseburger

Stupid News: I found Gold, The oven shot me and that doesn’t look anything like me

Laff lines: Body Shaming

 

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CATCH PHRASES

The catch phrase, words we use in our conversations and most of those phrases come to us from the movies and TV shows we watch.

Who hasn’t said, I have a bad feeling about this, DOH, or is that your final answer.

I use these all the time.  I find them a great way to give extra emphasis to a conversation and sometimes a way to lighten the mood.

So here is my attempt to tell a story by using these phrases

In 1984 mu cousin and I traveled to LA hoping to go see a taping of The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.  I was forward to hearing Ed say “HERE’S JOHNNY” But we experienced the THRILL OF VICTORY AND THE AGONY OF DEFEAT, when we were told Johnny was on vacation DOH! I was feeling really down when I though WHY SO SERIOUS and when I found out the guest host was going to be Joan Rivers. Guest on the show included Oliva Newton John OH YEAH and IT’S A GOOD THING.

The vacation was full of being a tourist and since I was a young single man I was scoping for possible dates so HOW YOU DOING.   Nothing worked basically because I am very shy and using my best pickup lines weren’t working but I persisted and got lots of no thank you and I would always want to say IS THAT YOUR FINAL ANSWER

So I decided to just enjoy myself on vacation with visit to see the Hollywood walk of fame.  Mingling with people from all over the world introducing themselves THIS IS MY BROTHER DARYL AND THIS IS MY OTHER BROTHER DARYL.  My own cousin must have thought he was with Cousin Eddie from the Vacation movies when I would look at the restaurant menus and would tell the waitress to GIVE ME SOME OF THE YELLOW… AND DON’T GET STINGY ON ME.

Every day we would load up in the FAMILY TRUCKSTER and HIT THE ROAD JACK.  There was a day trip to San Diego who was begging us to COME ON DOWN.  I reminded here that we were in a car and not DE PLANE DE PLANE.  But after much conversation she gave me An OFFER I COULD’NT REFUSE.   A free haircut and a home cooked meal BAM!

Another day in LA and a tour of the NBC studio’s where a tour guide showed some items use on our favorite TV shows.  She asked if anyone knew what this item was and I PITY THE FOOL who didn’t know what is was, so I spoke up and correctly identified it as an item from the 1st episode of the A- Team.

As the tour continued we stopped at a small shoe shine stand, the same stand that Johnny Carson talked about on his show.  AYYY that was pretty cool and the tour group was looking at the autographed pictures talking about their favorites then with my big mouth I noticed one autograph that no one talked about so it was time for me to MAKE IT SO and spoke up when I saw GENE GENE THE DANCING MACHINE.

Vacations end and as entered the Hollywood airport I ready to LOOK UP IN THE SKY.   As I boarded my flight I said to the flight attendant I’LL BE BACK and the attendant said FRANKLY MY DEAR I DON’T GIVE A DAMN!

So that was my feeble attempt at catch phrases!  Hope you join me Wednesday morning until them LIVE LONG AND PROSPER.

On today’s show we had fun with a NBA Superstar who is in trouble with his mom for bad words

Stupid news: A new diet plan and Monkey business

Laff lines: Tracy Morgan about being a drug dealer

THANKLESS JOBS

Some people have thankless jobs from the website Excite.com here are 5 jobs that are thankless but I think they forgot one but 1st here are 5

Farmers, Garbage collectors, Window Cleaners Police fire and Ambulance dispatchers and IRS Agents SAY WHAT! WHAT WAS THAT, DID I JUST READ YOU RIGHT ARE YOU KIDDING ME IRS AGENTS!!!!!!!!

For all those agents I am only joking——PLEASE KNOW I AM ONLY JOKING PLEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But I think one of the most thankless jobs has to be a TV weather reporter.  Take this past weekend for instance.  On Wednesday, Thursday and Friday there were predictions of showers and thunderstorms for Saturday morning so what happens in Northern Utah it was a spectacular Saturday.  I think the nicest day of the year.

Alas , the poor weather man or weather person ( got to be PC nowadays) makes these predictions and most of the time they are at very least but not on Saturday and now they have to put up with people like me making fun of them on a blog post just like this one.    Think of it at least once in your life you saw Mark Ewbank in that white coat and you called him nasty names.   Just remember the times they got it right!  When thunderstorms popup, the scorching heat of summer or even that blizzard that hits during the morning commute (stupid white coat anyway) that these people are highly trained professionals but Mother Nature can throw a wicked Curve ball!

I even considered becoming a Meteorologist but then I found out you had to use math and …..HEY IT’S MATH!!

Just remember this IRS agents I WAS ONLY KIDDING!

Starting Tuesday May 22nd during the morning show be listening for the Chewbacca Battle cry — here is what sounds is like.

When you hear it during the morning show only be caller 10 at 753-1039 or 279-8855 and if you are the 10th caller I will give you 2 tickets to see ‘SOLO, A STAR WARS STORY”  on Tuesday May 29th at the University Stadium for the 7pm showing.

Today on the morning show a heartwarming story of kindness from Huston Texas.  And we had some fun at the expense of THE ROYAL WEDDING!

Stupid news: A New York Barber goes WWE and what do you hear?    AGAIN

Laff lines:  Jimmy Fallon on Wedding fails

 

ENVIROMENTAL CONCERNS

In this PC world is it still OK to call some environmentalist TREE HUGGERS?

I have been thinking a lot about the term “Man-made Climate change” lately.  I hear the gloom and doomers say the world is on the road to destruction because of what we are doing to Mother Nature.   Well the last time I looked WE ARE PART OF NATURE!

However I will say we need to be better to our planet.   I fear the pollution that clogs our air here in Cache valley with the inversion.  I worry about the water supplies we have here in the west.  We are growing in population but little is being done to increase water supplies and as you know we have had drought conditions, yet I see sprinklers on during a rain storm and sprinklers watering the sidewalk more that the lawn.  I foresee a time in the not so distant future some harsh laws to ensure we have water for all of us.

One aspect that I hear a lot about is the term global warming and how it is affecting.   I am not so sure about that and here’s’ why.  Last year it was cold and we were dumped on by snow.  Then this year warmer than normal and dry.  Every summer it gets hot and some summers are really hot year just a few years ago during the Cruise in the temps were in the low to mid 80’s.

One more thing this week was very pleasant on a weather report that said the high temperature was 84 but not near as warm as the record high of 93 back in 1923!   It is things like this that make me wonder.  I have seen 18 inches of snow in Memphis TN in March.  Snow on June 12th of 2002 here in Logan, so I hope you see that in my feeble mind I question some of the knee jerk reactions I hear on the news.   Yes I want a cleaner environment but sometimes I just wish the gloom and dormers would give solutions instead of fear tactics.

Remember this the comments on this blog are mine and mine alone they are my thoughts and observations over the years.  I am not the brightest most educated person you have ever met but I ain’t ignorant, our as we spell it on the air I-G-N-R-T.

Here are some random thoughts from this week that we didn’t talk about.

A new study says that eating a lot of pasta, potatoes, or rice can actually help you LOSE weight!!!!!! Fill you up, so you’re less likely to snack on junk food.  So you end up consuming fewer calories overall.

So here’s the question:  If you could eat ANY food every day without suffering the consequences, what would it be?  Here are the 5 most common answers people gave in a new survey . . .

  1. Pizza.
  2. Burgers.  That is me
  3. Ice cream.
  4. Mexican food.
  5. Chocolate.

Then a Dr in the UK says if you hater vegetable and you still need that nutrition all you need is one begin in your diet and that is Broccoli why? Because broccoli promotes healthy gut bacteria, which helps your immune system.  And healthy gut bacteria has even been linked to a lower risk of mental-health issues.

On today’s morning show we had some travel advice

Stupid news wasn’t stupid at all but KOOL: The Grad speaker at Kent State and a 93 year man says goodbye to golf in a great way

Laff lines all about computers

 

 

90’s SITCOMS

 

I love sitcoms from the early days of TV like Leave it to beaver and the Andy Griffith show during my teens it was The Odd couple and Lavern and Shirley and today I really enjoy Young Sheldon and The big Bang theory

However today let’s focus on the sitcoms of the 1990’s.  Recently a website using Google Trends came up with a list of the favorite 90’s sitcom in each state

13 states showed that Friends is there favorite sitcom and the big surprise to me anyway was Seinfeld only to the top sport in two states, New York and Massachusetts

So what about the favorite here in Utah drum roll please ……

THIRD ROCK FROM THE SUN!

I love me some 3rd rock.  Wacky, slap stick comedy with a hart.  As four aliens come to this planet to learn for The Big Giant Head this sitcom was and is priceless The romance of Dick and Mary, little Tommy the old man of the group, Sally and her fight to find love in the arms of Wayne night and of course there is Harry.   I recently found a DVD set of 3rd Rock.  Sounds like I have some marathon watching ahead of me…I just hope I don’t spit my Mt Dew through my nose.

Other great 90’s sitcoms Friends, two words Jennifer Anniston!!!!!    Three words “HOW YOU DOING”

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.  Good show but Carlton was great

The King of Queens – is one of the sitcoms I liked at the time but find it hard to watch in re-runs.

Frasier:  Who would have thought a story of a stuffy Psychiatrist moving to Seattle to be on the radio could be so dang funny.  Niles Loves Daphne.  The dad who has his special ugly chair.  This is a classic that I still love to watch

The Simpsons.  What can you say but Doh, Don’t have a cow man and DONUTS mmmmmmm!

Seinfeld we wrote about that yesterday so just Yada Yada Yada over this part.

Everybody loves Raymond.   Great show Doris Roberts as the medaling Mom reminded me so much of someone I know. No it was not my mother

I did see on the list a few sitcoms I just did not care for like The Nanny, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, and a show that I just do not like in the least and it was a huge hit.

I have tried many times to watch That 70’s show but I can’t and it surprises me because the time line is the same time line as I lived.  But for the life of me I cannot stand that show.

I know my taste are a lot different than the younger generation but most of today’s sitcoms tend to go for shock humor instead of  real comedy which sometimes will use shock humor but only in a limited basis.

Time for me to go I wonder if The Andy Griffith show is on.

On today’s morning show we had some fun Laurel or Yanni (I still don’t care) and Being Happy!

Stupid news Love- Get out of my home and a nice story from Oklahoma

Laff lines: Doing voice over work

GOOD NEWS BAD NEWS

        

 

Bad news, Good news.  That happened to me yesterday at the Doctors office.   I have not been feeling well since the 1st of the year but my Doctor said that I had an Upper Repertory infection and that should be ok soon.

NOW THE BAD NEWS THAT WASN’T SO BAD BUT STILL BAD

I have a condition in my legs that causes a lot of pain and the Doc said that it would not get any better.  Oh well what cha gonna do?

While at the hospital I ran into people I haven’t seen in months or ever years.   I am not sure what that means but maybe it has to do with getting older and having lots of appointments for health care and my friends are getting older and they have appointments …. Well you get the picture.

We all run into people we know at strange places.  I was at the Salt lake airport and saw a friend from Missouri.   I ran into friends at restaurants in Ogden and Salt Lake, Wendover, Las Vegas, you just never know when it is going to happen.

Here is a strange one,   I have friend who lives in Idaho and several years ago he took a vacation to watch the INDY 500.  So here he is in a crowd of over 100 thousand people and he sees a friend who had moved from Idaho to North Carolina and bam the meet at the 500.

In my job I often run into people who know me but I don’t know them.  I have had people who recognize my voice or I introduce myself to someone and use my name they will ask … are you that guy on the radio?   On Thursday of last week it happened 3 times.  I am always amazed and humbled when someone takes the time to show me kindness or say good things about KOOL.

Today on the morning show we had a matter of perspective – oh to be a teacher in North Carolina and Dogs

Stupid news: brownies and Dancing

Laff lines: sweat pants

I SO TIRED

 

I grew up watching the gang comedy’s or The Little Rascals as they are called by most people.  Every day for years it was part of my morning routine as I was getting ready for school to watch the little rascals.  I love that show.

One of my favorite comedy lines came from the character Farina.  On a lazy summer day he would Say “I’s 2 times as tired as you is cause I’s 2 times as big as you is”   That is the way I have been feeling over the past several months with a combination of chronic pain and an infection in my leg I have not slept well the past few months.

I have played so many game of spider solitaire and read books (comic books of course).  I have come into the station yawning and feeling like I was going to fall asleep while I was talking.  But the funny thing is on some of those days I have put together what I feel have been shows.  My only thought is that when I am things my concentration goes up.

I am getting better, however last Thursday and Friday mornings were I was here on about 2 hours sleep.  I would go home and take a nap after my show but it still is not enough sleep.  Last night I had a good night’s sleep and here I sit at the keyboard yawing, yawning and yawing.

So off to the Dr I go again today to see what we can figure out then I am off to take a nap.  AHH NAPS!

As I was getting ready for this morning I did find this that might help all of us.

A recent poll found its common for people to take up to 30 minutes to fall asleep.  Mostly because we lie there stressing out about everything we have to get done the next day.

So if you have trouble sleeping, here are the top five things OTHER people do when they can’t sleep and need to unwind . . .

  1. Read.
  2. Watch TV.
  3. Take a bath.
  4. Just close your eyes and try to clear your mind.  So in other words, meditate.

I was saddened to hear about the death of Margot Kidder who died at her home in Montana on Sunday.  There’s no word on a cause of death, but her manager said she died peacefully in her sleep.  She was 69 years old.

Most   us remember Margot as Lois Lane in the four Christopher reeve Superman films movies that came out between 1978 and 1987.

Today on the morning show: The Royal wedding and the WWE wedding.

Stupid news has a mother and son going to jail on Mother’s day, Baby got back, and a 3 year upstages Mom

Laff lines.  James Corden on the Supreme Court and sports betting

 

HELLO SCHMOOPIE

It was a show about nothing!  Nothing is good!   20 years ago tonight May 14th the final episode of Seinfeld aired on NBC.

The story of 4 friends almost didn’t make the cut its 1st year.  The 1st episode was called “The Seinfeld Chronicles” was just popular enough with the audience to continue on NBC and as the show stated to hit its stride the audience came around to laughing at the life’s of Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer.

The final episode feature the 4 jetting to Hollywood to film pilot  for NBC  when troubles on the jet forced a landing in a small town and witnessing a carjacking without trying to help the victim.  A new law called the “Good Samaritan Law” was broken and our four had to go to court to face charges.  Where they were convicted and sentence to spend one day in jail.

Side not.   The man who was car jacked was the late stand -up comedian and actor John Pinnete.  He is one of my favorite comedians and based on the amount of feedback we get could be one of yours too.   I got to meet John about 25 years ago at the Rivera where he was performing.  Here is a routine of John Pinnete.

Back to the SHOW ABOUT NOTHING.

It amazing to think about how much the show affected our lives and speech.  Think about it – How many times have you heard “NO SOUP FOR YOU” “SERINTY NOW” OR “HAPPY FESTIVUS “?

Some of my favorite lines include_ These Pretzels are making me thirsty, That is one magic logie, He’s a regifter, Shinkage, I don’t want to be a pilot, and The dingo are your baby.

Here is 100 quotes from Seinfeld

But the phase I use the most in everyday life comes from “The Soup Nazi” No it isn’t No Soup for you, it the word Smoopie.   The term of endearment that Jerry and his girlfriend used to determine who the Smoopiest was!   My wife and I still use the term or variations to express our love and friendship with each other.  AWWWWWWWW as to quote The Church Lady ‘Isn’t that special”

So the next time I answer the phone don’t be surprised if I say ‘Vandalay Industries”.

Here is a true story that happened to me, I took my in-laws to Salt Lake to have some work on a vacuum cleaner.   I AM NOT KIDDING THE BUISNESS WAS CALLED VANDALY INDUSTRIES.    I did not have a phone with a camera in it so I don’t have the proof but my wife and I were about to lose it and my in-laws were saying what’s so funny.  Google it!

It was a great show and still one of the most popular in syndication.  Not bad for a show about nothing.

Today’s Stupid News:  A woman in Florida had a warrant for her arrest you will not believe where cops found her, a law suit over Ice cream and laundry.

Laff lines: I am not a Thug