I’M BATMAN

In 1966 I was a Bat kid.  I wanted to be Batman.  When the TV series came on it was hey don’t bother me Batman’s on.  How Bat Crazy was I to this day when someone ask me what one of my favorite Christmas presents was I say when my mom got me a White Batman T-shirt with the batman logo on it.  I was in Bat hog heaven.  I think I wore it I grew out of it I loved that shirt.

Another Bat memory involves my Mother.  I had told you in the past where we didn’t have a lot of extra money but when The Batman Movie came to Memphis she took a day off of her work so I could go.   I remember waiting to get into the drive- in on what is now Elvis Presley Blvd.  I can remember Mom’s smile as she paid for our tickets and handed me the autographed Black and White Batman and Robin publicity photo.

You probably think my love of Batman took a few years off.  Not so- anytime there was a Batman Cartoon series I was watching.  The Super Friends I loved.

As the years went by the Michael Keaton Batman movies found me munching POPCORN and loving the stories.  Batman the Animated series is considered a classic.  And one of my favorite Batman shows of all time was Batman Beyond.  Some of the best dramatic writing on TV telling a great story of the relationships of an aging Bruce Wayne and Terry McGinnis.  It was and is one of my wife’s favorites too.  One year for Christmas she asked me for Batman Beyond the complete series.   Is she not the perfect woman for me?   Holy Matrimony —YEAH.

As more hero movies come out, my most anticipated ones always have Batman.  When I had my knee replacement surgery I was upset because Batman V Superman came out. (Yep I loved it)

Why this love of the caped crusader?  I think it was because he lost his parents early and I lost my dad early. Bruce Wayne always wanted to stand up to bullies and the bad guy and over the years I find myself sticking up for those who can’t themselves.

I collect Batman comics and action figures…  my collection though KOOL has very little value but I love looking at them and enjoying them

Last night I received a call from a friend who wanted to come over and give me something.  Hey a gift — I’m in.  My friend Mitch knows I have some mobility issues and made me a walking stick…. But not just any stick A BAT STICK.

          

 

Holy Splinter in my finger that is so KOOL

Yesterday at the radio station Will told me he had just interview Burt Ward.  Robin on the Batman TV show.  The interview is about 10 minutes and Burt talks about his charitable work and then about 6 ½ in they talk Batman

The website again is Gentlegiantdogfood.com

Thanks will for letting me use this.  (He’s a big Bat fan too)

Stupid news: A snow day in Alaska and being open 24 hours in Texas doesn’t mean a lot

Laff lines Modern Parenting

 

A SICK WEEKEND THAT WAS KIND OF FUN

How to make being sick into a great weekend.

Last Thursday I had an appointment to get a haircut but as I left my house I noticed I wasn’t feeling the best and by the time my hair was shorter I was hit hard.

To make a long story shorter.  I would up in insta car on Saturday morning and the diagnoses the dreaded FLU LIKE SYMPTOMS.   Dud I had a flu shot? “They don’t work all the time” he said.  I said several words that shall remain anonymous to protect the not so innocent and my job!  LOL

The Dr. gave us a prescription for Therma flu, and my wife dropped me off at home while she went to get stocked up for the weekend.  She was getting a chest cold  herself,  and she was so awesome all weekend taking care of me  while she wasn’t feeling great.

A few minutes later I get a text saying our pharmacy had ran out of the Therma flu and they were trying to find some in the city.  It took a while but medicine was on its way.

ONE GRIPE

THE PILLS WERE ON A STIP OF PLASTIC WITH THE PLATIC BUBBLE  YOU KNOW THE ONES WHERE THEY SAY JUST PULL THE TAB IN THE CORNER  Yeah right I hope that I can survive getting the pills out.   This morning it took me almost 5 minutes.  I couldn’t get the little tab to come off the plastic.  The plastic with corners so sharp that you can carve a stake with them.  Oh day just bend it and take it off the card, the perforation for easy separation was designed by someone who didn’t quite crapes the situation.   I see the perforations but they don’t perforate.   Solution BLOT CUTTERS …. No I used scissors all the well questioning the designer’s parentage.

Rant ends here

The rest of the weekend was spent napping eating and watch the Marvel Super hero movies in order.  We watch Civil war.  All in all being sick on the weekend doesn’t sound like fun.  But mine was pretty fun!

I need to find some more scissors

Today on the morning  show :  When the Saints got screwed this weekend

Stupid news  Good news Bad News ,and a stupid burgalur

aff lines  Jeff foxworthery

 

I AM SO SMRT

I freely admit it, I am not the most educated man on the earth.  I just did not enjoy school.  I enjoyed learning but like my Mom told “You get good grades in subject you like” YEP MOM THAT IS ME

I also that my personality was one of I didn’t care if I got an A or D.  I did care about the F’s (not that I ever got one or 15) I always thought that if I was learning something the grades didn’t matter.  I found out later that good grades look good for resume writing.

What brought this on was a survey about our education from.

How much of what you learned in school do you actually use in the real world?  A new survey asked 2,000 people, and the average answer was 37%.

That means we think about two-thirds of the stuff we learned was basically useless knowledge.  Here are the ten real-world skills we WISH we’d been taught instead . . .

  1. Money management and budgeting. (I know that some schools are doing this)
  2. How to do your taxes.
  3. How to manage your emotional wellbeing and mental health.
  4. Understanding credit cards and student loans. (I can’t believe the amount of student loan debt there is,)
  5. How to negotiate. (I am getting better at that one)
  6. Time management. (Boy do I need that one)
  7. How to fix stuff around the house. (I am dangerous with a hammer or screwdriver)
  8. Relationship and conversational skills. (How about adding not being a jerk on social media)
  9. Car repair and car maintenance. (See number 7)
  10. How to find a job. (A life skill we all need)

The survey also asked people to name the most USELESS things they were forced to learn in school.

If you’re a scientist or math teacher, these might come in handy.  And some people may argue the benefits of having a base knowledge of this stuff.  But you probably don’t use it unless you’re helping your kids with THEIR homework . . .

  1. The Pythagorean Theorem to figure out the dimensions of a triangle. (I thought a theorem was something you took you temperature with)

(The equation is A-squared, plus B-squared, equals C-squared.) (I knew that)

  1. Knowing that Pi is 3.14. ( MMM PIE)
  2. Memorizing the periodic table of elements in chemistry. (I can’t even remember where I put my keys)
  3. Learning the different types of rocks . . . sedimentary, metamorphic, and igneous. (If you smell what the Rock is Cooking)
  4. Learning the parts on an atom. (That guy on DC’s Legends of Tomorrow
  5. Learning what mitochondria is . . . a.k.a., the “powerhouse of a cell.” (I ain’t going to Jail)
  6. Naming all of the presidents in order. (George Washington – Abraham Lincoln—Andrew Jackson— Ulysses S. Grant.  They are all on money that what I remember)
  7. Learning about osmosis(It’s the, quote, “process by which molecules of a solvent tend to pass through a semipermeable membrane from a less concentrated solution into a more concentrated one.”  Now you know. (I thought Osmosis was a panelist on the View)
  8. Learning how to make paper snowflakes in elementary school. (I learned how to write my name in the snow—does that count)
  9. Learning about photosynthesis in plants. (I just use my Cell phone photos now)

 

Today on the show: I am worthless on Fridays’ and The NFL playoffs

Stupid news:    Frosty’s Revenge and a stupid emotional support animal.

Laff lines: Being average looking

 

MONEY OR THE LACK THERE OF

When it comes to money I always say “Money talks, I just wish mine had a larger vocabulary”

Do we ever think “Hey I have enough money” I am not sure if that is our human nature.   I am not trying to sound cynical, but sometimes have a little extra cash takes a little stress out of lives.

To be fair we do need to keep a perspective about our money and I hope we all can find time or money to help others.

Why all this deep thinking about money… cause I ain’t got none.   Well to be honest I am doing OK but ……..

Today a new sturdy from yougov.com asked people what salary someone would have to earn to be rich.  And for the majority, the answer is . . . about $90,000 to $100,000.

Here are a few more results from the survey . . .

  1. The majority of people believe that being “poor” means you make less than $30,000-a-year.
  2. 2% of people think you’re rich if you’re making $100,000-a-year.
  3. And finally, 2% of people think you’re “poor” even at $100,000-a-year.

And then there is this that I read today about stay at home moms:  Everyone knows stay-at-home moms should be paid HUGE money for all the work they do . . . instead of the $0 they’re actually paid.  And this year, it turns out they’ve earned a big raise.

Salary.com just did its annual study on how much stay-at-home moms should be paid based on all of the jobs they do.

And the answer is . . . $162,581, which is up almost $5,000 from last year.

That’s based on a mom doing 34 different jobs, including Academic advisor . . . accountant . . . coach . . . day care worker . . . event planner . . . groundskeeper . . . interior designer . . . janitor . . . photographer . . . psychologist . . . nurse . . . tailor . . . and teacher.

I salute those stay at home moms.   It is getting harder and harder for a mom to stay at home.  Not only because of the economic pressure but also there is a social pressure to not be a stay at home mom.   I think that is a shame, the decision on being a stay at home mom or not is a personal decision and we (men and women) should not judge either way.

Here are some great quotes about money

 “Never spend your money before you have earned it.” —Thomas Jefferson

 “It’s good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it’s good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure that you haven’t lost the things that money can’t buy.” —George Lorimer

 “Many folks think they aren’t good at earning money, when what they don’t know is how to use it.” —Frank A. Clark

 “You must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you.” —Dave Ramsey

 “A wise person should have money in their head, but not in their heart.” —Jonathan Swift

 “The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket.” —Will Rogers

Finally one of my favorite quotes about money.

“Your love gives me such a thrill, but your love it don’t pay my bills.  I want money”   Barret Strong and Motown records founder Barry Gordy Jr.

 

The morning show we talked Alexa.

Stupid news: getting kicked off a cruise ship.  And a peeping Tom picked the wrong house.

Laff Lines: Having a great wife

IT WAS A STRANGE DAY

 

I had one of those days….. Not really just a strange day

As you know my day starts at 4:15 in the am.  Take care of the three S’s ( Shower ,Shave, Shampoo) breakfast and off I go to arrive at the station around 5am and it is time to get down to the job at hand.   Playing radio!   I love playing radio, it is a job that lets me be creative and have fun.   I was yawing a lot and kind of sleepy but things were going well tell about 8:15am.

About that time all I wanted to do was take a nap!  I yawned so much my eyes were watering with teardrops going down my checks AHHHH!  But I had a job to do so buck up soldier.  I tried. I really tried.

I was writing the blog post for Tuesday and struggling staying awake and I guess I nodded off for a little.( don’t tell the boss )  I woke up looked at the screen and saw 43 lines of the letter K.   43 lines.   I just wanted a nap but I still had things I needed to do.  I woke up a little and made it through the morning.   Time to go home for lunch and a nap.

Not so fast.  I got home and was wide awake.  About 1pm a short nap did happened (Yeah for naps).  I decided that I would wash the dishes (Yes, I do dishes and laundry too).  One little thing, I forgot to turn on the dish washer!  I even texted my wife to tell her the dishes are done.  About an hour and a half later.  Light bulb moment.   I turned on the dishwasher.

The strange day continues about 1am this morning I woke up with nature calling and I don’t have call waiting.

As I am getting back into bed I look at the alarm clock and promptly turn off the alarm!  Luckily I woke up about 4:30am and got to work at the usual time.  I guess when I turned off my alarm I unplugged my phone and now the battery is way down and I have received a bunch of text from friends and family.  I answered two of them with the wrong info… yep I didn’t look to see who I was texting.

It has been a strange 24 hours.  At least I am awake!!! But man I need a nap

Today on the morning show.  Netflix and Screen time

Stupid News:  I left a note- teaching a kid a lesson and cell phone theft.

Laff lines: Mini vans

 

THE FONZ AND ME

Who was KOOLer than the Fonz!  Ayee!  No one

I was 45 years ago on this date January 15th 1974 Happy Days debuted on TV.   The show about growing up in the late 50 actually got its start as a short on Love American style.  Then you could say it got its start with the success of American Graffiti.

Whatever!    I LOVED IT.

The original opening song was Bill Haley and the comets “Rock around the Clock” that got me hooked right away.

The started with a focus on Ritchie and his quest to find his Thrill on Blueberry Hill.  The Fonz was not a major player at first but Henry Winkler connected with the audience and the Fonz was a Phenom.

I could go on and on about the Fonz but I really think the show was successful because of the supporting characters.  Ralph Malph, Potsi, Mr. and Mrs., C, Arnold, Al and who could forget Chaci and Joanie.

Just a couple of quotes that I still use today when the situation requires it.

Ralph and Potsi are looking at a girly magazine and Potsi says “Wow, wouldn’t like to see a sweater on her” Ralph comes back with this classic line ‘POTSI, YOU’RE SUCH A POSTSI’ I love that line.

Another simple comedy line comes from Al the man who bought the diner were every one hung out. The line is one  word repeated Yep,yep yep yep yep.  Put that is context and I laugh every time.

Two of the spin offs were brilliant.   Mork and Mindy with the brilliant Robin Williams and one of my favorite TV sitcom “Lavern and Shirley.  The less said about Joanie love Chachi the better.

Where I thought Happy Days was great was the relationship between The Fonz and Ritchie.  Friends who would do anything for their friend.

Happy days even gave us a showbiz catch phrase “JUMP THE SHARK” That moment when a great show starts its decline.

Happy Days was a great show for its time and I still enjoy watching it when I get a chance.

I like to think I am a KOOL guy.  Here I am every day working on KOOL.  But I realize I now that that as KOOL as I am.  I am at best way down the list.

  1. The Fonz. 2 Joe Cool. 3 Batman.  The Rock and then ME! 

 I know there so many others that should be before me.  But my wife thinks I am KOOL.  Just not Fonzi, Joe Kool, Batman or the Rock Kool, she might ad Captain America in that list. As long as I am in that list I am KOOL with that.

     

 

Today on the Moring show.  The Clemson Tigers, the Whitehouse    and fast food.   Also we talked retirement.

Stupid news.  Killing people with kindness and stupid jeans’

Laff Lines:  Love and relationships

 

DID I REALLY DO THAT? YES, YES I DID

STUPID IS WHAT STUPID DOES AND BOY AM I STUPID!

 

After this mornings “Stupid news” I started to think about the times in my life I have done some stupid things and most of those involved sports injuries.

I have always loved sports.  I wasn’t graceful or fast or …. Talented but I did try.  TO HURT MYSELF!

It all started when I was very young when I tried to balance on a basketball.   Sprained my ankle on that one.

In touch football I zigged the other kid zagged my eye socket and his head collided, his head won that fight. Half my face was bruised.

Rolling down a hill in a rain storm to splash into ditch.  Hit an empty beer bottle and put a huge gash in my ankle

At the bowling alley trying to show off I got down like a quarterback behind center to receive the bowling ball as it came back.  Problem was the ball return was covered and I put my hand inside the covered return.   The ball came and KABLAMO  hand stuck in the ball return and yes it hurt then came a 2nd ball ,oh the words that came out of my 5th grade mouth.    Got a badly bruised hand and ego on that one.

Broken bone in my right foot playing “Dodgeball”!

Broke my elbow in the 11th grade trying to learn how to be a Pro Wrestler.  A man I knew was in training and he was showing me some “moves”  I fell wrong and broken bone in the funny bone region.   The Dr gave me the option of surgery or not.  No surgery but to this day it swells up and hurts.

I through my back out playing FOOSBALL.

Another back injury by running into a wall playing Racquetball.   ‘Those walls are hard”

I finally decided I needed to slow down and play safer sports like Badminton.  Then I sprained my knee playing Badminton.

So when I get together with friends and we talk about our Glory Days and the injuries playing sports.  When they talk about a gruesome knee injury or broken nose playing sports like football, basketball or maybe skiing.  I get to tell the story of how I wrecked my back playing Foosball!

Today we found out the cast of Celebrity Big Brother

Stupid news: Don’t drive blindfolded, don’t eat the seat and Snakes in your mouth?

Laff lines: Dads

 

 

FACE TO FACE

 

We have these devices these Smart Phones, computers, and the internet.  But there are times you need to talk to someone face to face.

Here is what I mean.  A couple of weeks ago I had a small problem with my TV provider and I called the toll free line to get help.  The lady on the other end was extremely helpful and nice.   While trying to correct the problem I had took a couple of tries and reboots that took time.  We had a very nice conversation in between.  All in all one of the best experiences I have had in a situation like that.  THEN SOMETHING HAPPENED!

During our phone call I asked the tech on the other end if she could transfer me to another department to take care of a portion of our service I wanted to stop.  BIG MISTAKE!!!

As nice and professional the 1st tech was the 2nd was the opposite.   She was nice enough — but how to I say this—- Her happy meal did not have any fries- Dumb as a box of rocks.

I was wanting to cancel my MLB extra innings package.  That’s all and this lady tried to cancel my entire sports package.   I tried to explain that it was an add on to our regular service, but when I said “add on” she thought MATH I’M BORED”   I told her several times even asked her to get some help but NOOOOOOO.  After about 15 minutes of this I said “Look, I am getting frustrated, you have not been trained about this so I will just hang up and try again later to get someone who knows what they are doing”

All that led to yesterday, I went into a storefront that handles the service I use and actually talked to someone FACE TO FACE!  It took about 3 minutes and I am a happy camper today.

All the tech couldn’t help me.  But a real person did

SCORE ONE FOR FACE TO FACE!

Today on the morning show:  Why you should start your New Year’s resolutions on March 4th

Stupid news:  A bucket List and a Parking ticket

\Laff Lines: Jim Gaffagan on beards

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM

Happy Birthday to my MOM!

My mother was born on this date in 1924 in Tennessee.  Growing up in the depression, seeing people she loved going off to serve in WW II.  Yeah Mom had a rough start and a lot of challenges.

Her greatest challenge was David Denton.

Yeah, Me!!!!!!!!!

My mother had the challenge of raising 5 kids after our father passed away when I was four years old.   My Mother had very little education when Dad died so she did the only thing she could and went back to school and became a nurse to support her kids.   I know it had to be so hard on her.  My Dad meant the world to her and here she was alone with the closest family living hours away.  Let’s just say I am a proud son of Martha Arlene DE Hart Denton.

Why do I say I was her greatest challenge?  Let me tell you about something my wife says about me.  I will be telling her some childhood memories and Teresa will look me square in the eye and say “ YOUR POOR MOMMA” to which I reply ‘ AND NOW MOM LOOKS DOWN FROM HEAVEN AND SAYS THAT POOR TERESA”

Mom always made sure we went to church on Sunday’s and several times mom would stop at KFC to get Sunday Supper.   Occasionally she would stop at a small hamburger stand that served the best soft served Ice Cream.

One Sunday I was wanting Ice Cream and I wanted it NOW.  I started begging mom to stop but she said NO!  Several times I mean a lot because I WANTED ICE CREAM!

As we got closer I had a plan that was sure to work.  Sitting behind Mom who was driving I placed my left arm between her door and the car seat and reached out and turned on the turn signal thinking I was so cute that she had to get me Ice Cream.  My plan did not work, I don’t think I ever saw my Mom so mad at me.

Fast forward a few weeks later on the way home from church I start in asking for ice cream.  No Mom said, several times, Ok a lot.  Then in my ice cream deprived brain I had an idea.

As we got closer to the Ice cream joint I started making the sound of a turn signal and my Mom busted our laughing and I got some ICE CREAM!

“My poor Momma”

We moved when I was in the 8th grade and lived 2 miles from school and Memphis did not have a bus system at the time so I walked to school both ways in the snow up hill, every day!!!!!  That is until I broke my foot and mom had mercy on me and would drive me to school in the mornings, usually we would stop at a store to grab a soda and snack.  To this day I can hear her in my head telling me to get me something and her a Tab and a Honey Bun.

So in my Moms honor today I will stop by the store and get her favorite treat —- A honey bun— I hate Tab so I will substitute it with something ——- anything but a Tab!

“My poor Momma”

I loved seeing my Mom laugh and she loved  Andy Griffin so in her memory here is Andy telling the story of “ What it was, was Football’

This still makes me laugh

Today on the morning show: Our favorite condiments

Stupid news:  PEEPS AND JAN –U – HAIRY

Laff lines:  A time Machine

 

ALL GOOD THINGS COME TO AN END

 

The New Year brings us a chance for renewal a chance to make a few changes in our lives, but with something new something has to go.  So I have looked into some of the movie and TV series that will end in 2019.

The “Star Wars” Skywalker Saga.  “Star Wars 9” finally brings to an end the family drama that has stretched over three trilogies and 42 years.  No this will not end Star Wars movies, and that is a good thing…

“Game of Thrones”.  The eighth and final season kicks off in April.   I have never seen it but I know a lot of people love it and are sad to see it go.  But don’t worry . . . Spin-offs are coming.

The Marvel Cinematic Universe as we know it.  “Avengers: Endgame” hits theaters on April 26th . . . after which many of the main characters that have defined the MCU will be retired or de-emphasized in favor of new blood.   I hope for a Black Widow and Winter Soldier movie.

“The Big Bang Theory”.  Such a funny show but it has ran it course but I will admit I will miss Amy Farafaler

“Gotham”.  Some critics just didn’t get this great TV series.  For me seeing a young Bruce Wayne growing into the role of the Dark Knight has been incredible.  I have enjoyed every minute of this series.  Oh and for critics

There will plenty of TV shows that will not be renewed this year and anticipated movies that will bomb.  My advice is ignore the critics and make up your own mind.  I can only tell you what I like and what I don’t.

Example:  I did not like”Thor, Ragnar Rock” at all and a lot of people loved it.

I had a friend who said to me “If we all had the same taste, this would be a boring world”

         

Today on the morning show:  A story out of West Valley that might bring a tear to your eye. And to tip or not to tip

Stupid News; An arrest in Pennsylvania and we go to dinner in Paris

Laff lines: Vacations